We went for a meal at Pizza Express in Truro. We arrived just before six, as some of the business consultants I was with were less than 5 years old. We stood for about two minutes, maybe a bit more. Standing like lemons (all be it sexy lemons, apart from the under 5's) we decided we would take a seat at the nearest available table. We sat, nobody came. Tick, tock, went the clock.
I suggested, after about seven minutes, that we should leave, but my social engagement advisor recommended against that "again". After fifteen minutes my "lets bail this pile and get some service" barometer was just about to flip into action when one of the staff came over to us...
You know that look when you break into someone's home, do a full scale multi-bedroom Bobby Sands, then abuse every pet they own and then sit doggy-style-naked in their lounge covered head to toe in THEIR mayonnaise waiting until they come home... well... we got that look here. That exact look. It gave me a fricking flash back to '02, thats for sure. So anyways... the look turned into a question... "Have you reserved this table?"
"Ummm... No... but equally we have been here for fifteen minutes with not a jot of our ontological status being acknowledged..."
"You can't sit here... this table is reserved." (nod to the door).
And then he walked away. Now, I'm paraphrasing the encounter a bit... but that's pretty much how it was. The rest of my party were soon out the door... slightly hungry but dignity still very much intact (apart from the youngest member of the business meeting who was constantly muttering on about everything she could apprehend being "thsthoopid").
I decided to hang back and confront Caesar herself. The manageress had a pleasant smile and manner, not dissimilar to those in charge of other restaurants in the City.... but she had a hollowness to her convictions. I felt I was speaking into the rancid, cavernous heart of the hegemony... and the only echo... was a whimper of the manageress clinging on to what remained of her establishment's consumer integrity.
It's funny, because last year we went there, and were served by the same person who was so rude to us tonight. All was good... and it's fair to say that meal played a bit part in one of the days that tipped us to agree, "let's move to Truro."
I've just done some quick research on the Pizza Express chain. Last year, it was part of essentially a family business running since the '60s.... but this year... to quote Wikipedia, Pizza Express was "taken private by private equity group Cinven in 2007." I see a pattern.
We are part of a vast and interconnected system of people with human rights and businesses with people's rights (corporations). I am not a lefty-let's-all-live-in-a-Tipi-Village-in-Wales kind of a guy. I'm not even anti-globalism; in order to satisfy our billions we need efficient global business systems and a free market.
But I do appreciate that there is a tension between what's best for us as individuals and what's best for us as consumers in this deep sea of consumption. The crux of the thin-crust is that we always... always... have the right not to consume. And so....
This blog is published under the Creative Commons Share Alike license, which basically means you can do what you want with it so long as you don't claim it to be your own work. But I am, as of this moment adding a new clause:
- By reading this work I will not eat at Pizza Express.
Note that this is not a moral clause, it's legal. I'm not saying you shouldn't go to Pizza Express, I'm saying legally, if you read this blog you are partaking in the agreement of a license that forbids it.
I digress... we needed another venue for our meeting and headed to that delightful pillar of the
Truro restaurant scene, the One Eyed Cat. What can I say; the food was fantastic as always, as was the service. Interestingly for the evening there was a "moot point" on the bill which the restaurant resolved impeccably.
A final note to fans of Pizza Express, thanks for reading midcornwall.com over the last three decades, enjoy your lives.
2 comments:
Blimey Mat, i can't believe you didn't blow a fuse with that dreadful service. If that were many other mortals there would have been some kind of Columbine style massacre. There is a lot to be said for studying Buddhist Philosophy it seems.
Mr P.Hut
My restraint had nothing to do with Dhama or the unavailability of AK's in Truro on a Wednesday night.
It was that simply, against the beast there is no action save for non-consumption.
Jah Warrior
Peace
Mat
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